Expectations

When I came to Japan, my plan was to not plan anything. For those who aren't already thinking "you idiot", I have to tell you that it was possibly the most horrendous plan I could have come across. It took me 10 minutes to even figure out how to buy a train ticket from the airport to my hostel, and that doesn't include the time it took to figure out which train to take. However, one benefit of my unfortunate plan was that I didn't have too many expectations, other than to expect the unexpected. And of course, the few expectations I did have proved to misguided at the least.

Perhaps the first thing that was a bit unexpected for me was getting to Japan and finding that contrary to many of my rich friend's stories, not every shop in Japan is open until midnight. In fact, most small family-owned shops are closed by 6pm, and there are a lot more small family-owned shops in Japan than Australia. Sure, you can walk down to the local Konbini (the sign above is translated "Family Mart: Alcohol and Cigarettes") pretty much any time of day, but in Australia you can drive down to the local petrol station any time of day and have a roughly equivalent experience. And don't go thinking that Japanese Petrol stations are at all as convenient as Australian ones - some of them still have a day each week where they are closed.

Another misconception that I had about Japan stemmed from how much they drink, but it turns out you can't just take your own countries drinking mistakes and extrapolate them in a completely different culture. For example, I have yet to find a place in Japan which is teaming with drunk people and fights. Of course this doesn't mean that Northbridge lacks a sister city in Japan, but it does mean that the whole country isn't one big party. Part of the reason for this is that a lot of the drinking in Japan happens in Izakayas, where you eat food with your drinks, and you're probably sitting across from your boss. But even if you want to go to a real epileptic-fit-inducing nightclub, you still have to find a way to get home. And the trains stop at midnight if its a week day - sometimes earlier on the weekends.

While I may try to make it sound like everything is always closed here, the reality is that shops generally close later here than in Australia, which is why everything here opens later too. I went for a walk at 8:30am today only to find that until about 10am there were less shops open than the number of bins in public places here - that is to say, pretty much none. It kind of makes sense I guess - if you want to go shopping at a scissors and knives store, planning to go between 10am and 4pm isn't any more of an inconvenience to you than running a scissors and knives store is to the owner. But Japan isn't the shopping utopia that some people think it to be - there are massive shopping complexes that are open from 10am till 10pm every day, but the interesting shops are usually family run ones which are sometimes open and sometimes not. And there are a lot more interesting family run shops than massive shopping complexes.

I guess what it comes down to isn't that Japan is horribly inconvenient, because being able to buy a can of beer from the local Konbini with a 2 minute walk and 200 yen is incredibly convenient. But, just like the doorframes which are small enough for me to bump my head on if I'm not thinking, or the exit signs in some buildings which are at a similar height, or the cheap food which you buy only to realize you can eat it in one bite, or the thickness of my mattress, or the height of my pillow which was seemingly modeled on a rock - business is like pretty much everything else in Japan - small. And if theres one thing I wish I had of expected about Japan, its that when I bought a piece of food, it would be tiny.

The speed of sound

So much has happened over the two weeks since I last blogged that I don't know where to start, the main thing of course being that I moved out of a single shoe-box sized room in a hotel, and into a Japanese "guesthouse" full of Japanese people and me. I won't go through the gory details, but basically despite the fact that it smells, its more expensive than a sharehouse, its a longish walk to the closest train station and I'm not allowed to eat/drink/hang my clothes out in my room, I actually like this place. Its got character due to the resident artist's crayon-like doodles over all the walls, and more importantly it has people. And even more importantly, those people spend time together, just hanging out, eating meals together, and generally being really welcoming.

Since I moved into this guesthouse last Monday, there have been at least 4 occasions where 7 or 8 people have just sat around the Kotatsu (a japanese table with a heater underneath and a blanket to put your legs under) and eaten dinner together. A lot of the time dinner is even cooked right there with people sitting around and talking. Its not uncommon for different people staying here to cook for everyone, and different people return the favor. I guess it must be partly because the people staying here aren't actually from Nagoya, and even if they stay here a whole year most of their friends are probably the people living here. But nonetheless, there seems to be a sense of community about this place that has been a stark contrast to the week I spent in my shoebox hotel.

I guess what it has taught me is how important it is to be around other people. Not understand most of what is going on around me is still incredibly hard, and even harder is learning things like the fact that you should chopsticks to eat the pizza-like thing (okonomiyaki) because it is on a plate. The fact that walking around the house without a pair of things on is considered unclean was a bit weird as well, but perhaps the funniest thing is that even though you need to wear thongs walking around the house, sharing bottles, chopsticks and shisha-hoses (I don't know the actual name) is fine. Things are never going to be easy when you're in another country, but so long as there are people to laugh with, things are better than being alone.

Bird shit on a tanned shoe

One thing that I was forewarned of before traveling to the land of people with black hair and tanned skin was that being a foreigner, people would stare at me. Some people seemed to enjoy the looks they got when they were here while others disliked them, but they all agreed that while they were in Japan, people looked at them. And they weren't wrong - I have been stared at on multiple occasions.

Like today when I visited a church (which incidentally was really cool, more on that later). Pretty much every little kid within eyesight would just ogle at me with these huge eyes, and if you made eye contact and smiled they would immediately turn away with this huge grin on their face and excitedly tell their mum that the strange white guy looked at them. But this wasn't the type of staring the people were talking about before I left - this is just what kids do. Kids stare at people because they're interesting, and make associations based on how people respond which will probably stay with them for the rest of their life. Eventually it gets hammered out of them, but have you noticed how much easier kids make friends than older people? Have you ever thought its because they're not afraid to make eye contact, or even worse actually talk to someone new?

Of course, just because you make eye contact doesn't mean you want to make friends or talk to somebody new. I also had people staring at me when I went to one of the big local parks during the middle of the day. Partly because of Japan's aging population and partly because of the time of day I decided to go out, every person I walked past seemed to be and old person trying to keep fit by running the jogging track at about a meter per minute. And, as you'd expect for people who were probably alive when us foreigners were bombing their homes, they stared at me. That said, if I was a Japanese person walking through a retirement village in certain suburbs of Perth, I'd be pretty happy if all the residents did was stare at me. Even having someone yell "go back to your own country" could be getting off lightly at times.

When you think about it, it kind of makes sense too that people would stare at me - I stand out look bird shit on a tanned shoe. I dress differently, my hair isn't black, I have pasty white skin, my facial features probably look like a car accident for someone who is used to the Japanese physique, and that's just what a mere foreigner like me notices. I probably smell horrible too. However, funnily enough when I actually got here, apart from the two above-mentioned occasions I barely noticed a single look. This isn't to say that people won't look at me - if you sat and stared at them for long enough you'd realize that a lot of people will sort of take a quick glance at you and sometimes the older people would give you a bit of a glare. However, if I sat and glared at a white person on a Perth train they'd probably also give me a strange look.

Speaking of which, I must confess that when I lived in Perth, I'd always end up staring at Asian people on the bus and train while trying to figure out if they were Japanese, Korean, Chinese, etc. Of course I tried my best to not make it too obvious, but I can't help but feel that all those people on the train thought I was staring at them because they were different, just like so many foreigners here in Japan complain about. But really, at the end of the day, people in Japan don't stare any more than people in Australia. And people in Japan have a reason to stare as well - Japan's reputation for multiculturalism doesn't actually exist. Really, at the end of the day, I wonder if the people who spread the rumor about Japanese people staring realize that to notice it they were obviously looking themselves?

Enemy of the State

It seems that every time I talk to anybody about my experiences so far in Japan, I'm either complaining, bitching, moaning, whining, or being otherwise generally melancholy about the whole ordeal. Now I'm not about to tell you that actually, the whole time has been awesome, but its probably about time I let on that there are at least some good parts about being here.

One of the first things that struck me about Japan is that people here aren't all treated as criminals. Comparing Japan and Australia in this regard may be slightly unfair seeing that Australia actually is all criminals, but the fact that in Japan you can buy a beer from a vending machine on the street struck me as ridiculously cool. Whatmore, you can actually drink it right there where you bought it, legally. Or in the local park. Or when you're walking to the local pub. Or even on the train! And you know what? There is less public drunkenness in Japan than Australia as far as I can tell. That said, I'm not about to recommend that Australia follow in Japan's footsteps, because you can't legislate culture into effect.

Speaking of vending machines, the next thing that has struck me as rather awesome is the fact that you can't walk 20m without finding a vending machine in any of the major cities. Seriously. At first, I found myself thinking "how do they afford to run all these vending machines?", "who pays for the land that they sit on?" and "do they really make money when there are so many of them around?". But then I started thinking more like an Australian - "where are the huge dents in the vending machines?", "why are there no giant penises carved into the machines" and "surely with such easy access to the vending machines the drinks would be stolen in quick order?". The fact that there are no bins in Japan, but the streets are somehow clean enough to eat from probably also stems from the the same cause.

So why can Japan dandily trot along without any of the rules that stop Australia from turning into some sort of teen-run dystopia? I think the answer is simple: culture. And the Japanese must know it, which is why they make us uncultured foreign types jump through so many hoops to be able to live here. In order to stop these unsavoury types from trying to stick around, the Japanese have imposed the following rules on foreigners:

• To get a mobile phone, job, bank account, or any other sort of account, you need something called a "gaikokujin tōroku", dis-affectionately referred to by us foreigners as a "Gaijin Card".
• Before you get a Gaijin Card, you are supposed to have a steady home address (i.e. not be travelling like me)
• To get said steady home address, most real estate agents will require you to have a job or a huge wad of cash, if they'll talk to foreigners at all. Remember though, you need the gaijin card before anyone will actually employ you.
• To be employed, you also need a bank account and surprise surprise, you need a gaijin card for that.

I've seen too many foreigners here who don't speak a single word of Japanese and don't care, people who knowingly break the rules knowing they can get away with it because it is too hard for the police to communicate with them, and people who just really don't try and integrate with Japanese culture. I guess at the end of the day its unfortunate that its so difficult for somebody in my position to make a life here, but I can see why the Japanese have done it. Foreigners here are mostly asses, consequently, the rest of us have to jump through hoops to prove we're not. Understanding this doesn't make me any less annoyed that I'm an enemy of the state for the next 1-2 weeks that it takes to get a gaijin card, but at least I can sort of see the reason why they do it.

That reason being people like me who just throw the whole maccas tray into the one bin instead of putting the leftover ice into the ice bin, putting the plastic cup top into another bin, and putting the chip tray, cup, and tray advertisement thing into another one. You should of seen the girls face when she saw me do it, I don't think I'll ever see anyone as horrified again in my life.

Is that edible?

Food is something that you very gradually learn about, without even realizing it. You grow up not liking brussel sprouts, then you get a bit older and you try them again for some reason and you like them. Same deal with beer. But usually you eat similar kinds of foods with similar kinds of tastes, and any change is gradual. Unless you end up in a foreign restaurant with a bunch of mates who can usually make recommendations, and a comforting Whopper is only a few hours away. Or, unless you end up in Japan. Then you're screwed.

So as you've probably guessed, I've had trouble with food here. The first few days were alright as I had friends showing me around, and even though the food wasn't great, it wasn't bad. And the best part is I didn't have to order it myself. But the first time I needed to get my own food, I found myself stuck. Are there supermarkets in Japan? What do I actually say to the person behind the counter? Do you need to take a shopping basket like everyone else is doing? Is it ok to take an umbrella into the store? Is the stuff inside the can with the word "ツナ" cooked or flavoured or anything?

So the first day I managed to make a tuna sandwich with tuna just like I expected, and funny bagged tomatoes. The bread tasted like plastic and the tomatos were expensive and old, but I was fairly happy with it. It was edible, and I didn't get any really funny stares at the supermarket. So, I tried to do the same thing the next day, which turned out to be a mistake - I bought what I thought was another normal bun to make a sandwhich, but I got home and found it was pre-spread with margarine and this funny black stuff. So, forced to be adventurous by the 110 yen that I just spent, I tried to make another tuna sandwich, and immediately regretted it. I found out from a nearby Japanese person that the black paste was red bean paste, and decided it was a better idea to through the remaining half out than to finish it. It was really, really awful.

Needless to say, I havn't been eating too much recently, a lot of the time I have found the thought of being hungry more bearable than the thought of having to deal with Japanese food again. Which isn't to say I havn't found some really really nice food in Japan, but the food I have found hasn't been remotely nearby, and hasn't been too cheap either. Izakayas are great, but only when you're with someone who can understand the menu enough to order something decent.

Now, for those who havn't travelled yet, you may not know how crazy backpackers are, but it suffices to say they're pretty crazy. Every night people are going out partying and drinking, waking up, recovering, rinse and repeat. The first few nights I've got back from exploring later than they've gone out, or was too tired to really give it a crack. But last night everyone decided to go to a nearby all-you-can-drink karaoke place with some Japanese friends, and I decided to tag along. To cut a long story short, all-you-can-drink apparently doesn't mean all-you-can-handle-to-drink, it means all-the-drink-you-can-physically-drink-in-2-hours, with a charge of $5 a drink if you don't finish everything that everybody else ordered. Couple with my lack of food I learned the hard way to not go drinking with backpackers.

Now what the hell did I do that for?!

Konnichiwa.

For those who don't know, I left Australia on Monday, and am just now getting a chance to write this blog that I promised.

So, the flight was horrible. Being an engineer I got on the plane and was like "this is *awesome*", until I saw the first class seats, and I thought "oh these look small, damn.", without realizing they were just the first class seats. After seeing economy seats, I kinda freaked out, and was pretty much ready to stay in Japan by the end of that flight. But, even after my two hours of plane-sleep when I arrived, I pretty quickly changed my mind and was ready to hop on another plane back home.

I grew up next to a train station when I was a kid. I've taken trains with or without help (or permission) from my parents my entire life. So, I just naturally assumed that when I got to Japan, taking a train from the airport to the backpackers wouldn't be an issue. Then I realized I needed to figure out how to use the ticket machine, then I had to realize that I couldn't buy said ticket form the ticket machine, I had to try to use Japanese after promptly forgetting everything I've learnt to buy the ticket, find the platform to take the train from (of which there were about 6), figure out which train to take (because trains from the same platform go different places), transfer to the correct train in the middle of the journey and again wait for the correct train. All without any help from anyone.

Its amazing I got from the airport to backpackers at all, but I did get there. So I managed to get through the whole setting up my room thing, and went out shopping with a Japanese friend to find a power adpater for my laptop, a mobile phone, a bank account, and a warm jacket for the below zero weather here. Each one of those is (almost) an adventure in itself, so I'll start with the power adaptor.

So, my friend helped me find the power adapter for my laptop, and armed with what I wanted to buy and enough cash to buy it, I went up to the person behind the counter, put the power adapter on the table, and tried to hand the person the money. Only for the girl behind the counter to stare at me as if I was some kind of idiot. She kept pointing at this little plastic McDonalds-looking tray on the desk though and it took me about 10 seconds to realize that you have to put the money in there. After which, she took the money out of the tray, put my change in the tray, and then it was like nothing weird happened.

So having bought my power adapter, we went off to SoftBank (a mobile phone shop) to buy a mobile. But then we were told I'd need a gaijin card (kinda like an ID card for foreigners) to get a
mobile phone, even though the website said you could get a prepaid phone without one. My Japanese friend argued with the girl behind the counter for a while before the girl just walked off when a new customer came in. So we tried another shop, sat there for 2 hours talking and filling out forms until the guy behind the counter this time called his boss and we got told it couldn't happen. What made it even more disappointing was the fact that when I got back to the backpackers, a Canadian friend with no gaijin card managed to get a prepaid phone.

With this newly learned knowledge of Japanese bureaucrat culture, I decided to forgoe getting a bank account for this week. Needless to say, its probably going to be more of an adventure than a mobile phone (which I still havn't gotten).

On a bright note, Japanese clothes shopping was awesome. I found a second hand clothes shop and got a nice flannelet shirt/jacket (which is all the rage in Japan) for 1500 yen (~$20). And the shop didn't have a tray, so I could even hand the girl the money. And then she saw my seppuku shirt and was so impressed that she wanted to put a photo on their website (which she did), but don't even ask for the link.

Apart from that I went to Kyoto and Nagoya. I spent more here just getting around on the train than I did driving a car in Perth, but I'll leave that for another day.

I need to go to take a picture of a weird building. Maybe I'll write here again if I remember the address.